Zander moaned as Jason kissed him hard and deep. He accepted the tongue in his mouth and kissed him back. He reached out, fumbling for the fastening on Jason's jeans, fingers slipping inside to wrap around the turgid shaft. It pleased Zander that he was already hard. This wouldn't take long and then he would have what he needed. The itch under his skin made him want to scream.
Jason broke the kiss as Zander freed his cock from his jeans. "Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked.
"Yeah...I'm sure." Zander pushed Jason back to the bed and made him sit. He opened Jason's legs then moved between them, on his knees. Zander gripped the base of Jason's cock then he took the tip into his mouth. Sorel had taught him how to give good head and there had been more than a few times when Zander had used this skill to get himself out of a beating. As he took the hard shaft deep into his throat, Zander found Jason's balls with his free hand and kneaded them.
"Wait..." Jason pulled Zander off his cock and drew him up for a kiss. Then he started to undress him.
Zander let himself be undressed, even as he helped Jason to get naked. Whatever Jason wanted, he would give him. Anything to get a fix. Zander started caressing Jason, fingers tweaking the flat nipples then reaching for the hard cock again. But his hands were slapped away. "I want to make you feel good," Zander protested, with a pout.
Jason nodded. "You will. Lie down." He pressed Zander onto his back on the bed, then he moved over him. He curled his fingers in the long, soft, hair and kissed him. Softly.
"More," Zander hissed, as he tried to grind himself against Jason. He didn't want soft and gentle. He wanted hard and fast and rough.
"My way," Jason countered, his eyes glittering.
Zander knew he had to obey. "Your way," he replied, forcing himself to relax and to let Jason take control. He felt the hands leave his hair to stroke over him, caressing him and kissing him, making him hot with need. And Jason touched him everywhere but his cock. His very hard cock which ached to be touched. "Please..." Zander begged, then he almost wept with relief when strong fingers curled around him and warm lips kissed the tip.
Jason brought Zander to orgasm, then he moved up the languid body and kissed him again. "Roll over." He watched Zander obey him. Then Jason slid off the bed and was gone long enough to get lubricant. Zander was as he left him. Jason slicked a finger and pushed into the puckered opening between the muscled buttocks.
"Mmmm..." Zander moaned as Jason's finger slid in. He moaned again as the knuckle brushed his hot spot, then he wriggled when another finger and another slid in, stretching him. It wasn't enough and it was happening too slowly. "Please...fuck me!" Zander begged.
"Shh..." Jason whispered, but he removed his fingers and lined up his cock.
Zander whimpered as the thick shaft pressed into him. He had a flash in his head of another time, another man, but younger than Jason. And he was younger too. Zander tried to focus on the image but it eluded him and then he was moaning as Jason pressed in another inch then another. Zander hissed in pain.
Jason froze. "We can stop."
"No...no...it's okay." Zander wanted his pills and he knew the burn would fade. "It's okay," Zander repeated. He felt Jason massage his lower back and as his body relaxed his inner muscles stretched around Jason's cock. "I'm okay now," Zander whispered. And it was strange that Jason would wait for him to adjust. Most of the guys Sorel loaned him out to would just yank his pants down, bend Zander over some flat surface and shove their cocks inside him. They never cared about his pain. Jason was different, Zander sensed that. But then all thought vanish as pain was replaced by pleasure. Jason had angled himself to brush over Zander's prostrate with each inward thrust. He could feel himself growing hard again. And as if Jason could read his mind, Zander felt himself pulled up onto his hands and knees and a hand wrapped around him. Zander whimpered, his body rocked by Jason's thrusts, then wetness filled him even as his own release came and they both collapsed onto the bed. Zander felt spent and he realized the itchy feeling was gone.
"You need to sleep," Jason said, as he eased out of Zander. He fetched a damp towel and cleaned the boy before covering him with the blankets.
Zander heard Jason and nodded. He was too sleepy to reply. He would get the fix later, when he needed it. Darkness swirled over Zander and he embraced it.
* * * * *
Images plagued Zander in his sleep. Faceless men moving over him. Touching him, kissing him, fucking him. Some gave him money. Some hit him. Some told him it would be all right. Some promised that they loved him. Promises that Zander had believed. He came awake with a start, shaking and shivering. He scrambled off the bed and backed into a corner, dragging a blanket with him.
Jason came into the room. He saw Zander rocking in the corner and went to him.
"NO!" Zander screamed, as Jason reached out to touch him. He tried to stand up but the blanket tangled his feet and he fell forward. Hands grabbed him and Zander lashed out at Jason. But Jason wouldn't go away. Wouldn't stop touching him. "No...no...NO!" Zander shouted. He heard Jason talking to him but the words were jumbled in his ears. He wanted him to go away. He kept screaming at him until his voice went hoarse, then Zander pressed into the corner and closed his eyes. But tears slid down his face. He turned into the wall, his knees drawn up and began to rock. Even with his eyes closed he knew he was not alone. He would never be alone. They wouldn't let him be alone.
"Shit," Jason muttered as he watched Zander physically retreat into himself. But he was quiet now and appeared calmer. Yet Jason knew something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong. He knelt down next to Zander being careful not to touch him, and suddenly he heard him whispering. Jason leaned in and what he heard chilled him.
"No Pete. Please...please don't." Then In a little boy's voice, Zander repeated, over and over again, "I'm sorry...I'm sorry...I'm sorry...I'm sorry...."
* * * * *
Elizabeth poked a fork into her potatoes. She knew she needed to eat but she wasn't hungry. She was worried, about Zander. Almost two weeks had passed since Jason had rescued him from Alcazar. Two weeks of hell for Elizabeth. Not that Alcazar had hurt her. He hadn't touched her nor had anyone else tried to. But not knowing where Zander was and how he was doing was torture. And it didn't help that Elizabeth had no clue where she was either. Just some remote villa somewhere. She was never allowed outside the inner gates.
Alcazar had been there for the first two days, taunting her about what he would do to punish her. But they had been empty threats. On the third day he got a phone call and had left the Villa and he had yet to return. It terrified Elizabeth that he might have found Zander again. Zander would be better off dead than Alcazar's prisoner.
"You're not eating, Miss."
"I'm not hungry." Elizabeth managed a smile for the housekeeper. Celia. She was about ten years older, pretty in an exotic kind of way and always nice to her. For that Elizabeth was grateful.
Celia nodded as she took the plate. "You're thinking of your young man again. Zander."
Elizabeth nodded. She had told Celia about him one night after collapsing into tears out of fear and stress. Celia had helped her to work through her fears and had told her to keep faith. Elizabeth had told her about the horrible things Alcazar had done to Zander, in a way as a test to see where Celia's loyalties lay. Celia hadn't seemed all that surprised. She had seemed sad and had told Elizabeth that Zander must be a strong man and that he would survive. Elizabeth knew that Zander was strong, she just prayed that he was strong enough.
"Would you like some coffee?" Celia asked.
Celia frowned. "What would you like?"
Elizabeth sighed. "To go home."
"Where is home?"
"Port Charles, New York."
Celia leaned in to Elizabeth and whispered, "Maybe I can help you."
* * * * *
Jason looked over at Zander's sleeping form on the bed. He had left Zander rocking in the corner and called Dr. Sorato. Zander didn't react when the doctor examined him. He just continued rocking. Jason and the doctor were able to take Zander into the bathroom and put him in the tub to get cleaned up. Then they had dressed him in light sweat pants and a tank top. Jason had put Zander into another bedroom. Dr. Sorato thought that the fact that Jason had had sex with Zander in the other bedroom might shake him up a bit at some point. "So what do I do now?" Jason asked.
Dr. Sorato shrugged. "There isn't much you can do. I know of a facility --"
"No!" Jason wasn't about to let Zander out of his sight. He'd gotten a call from Sonny. Alcazar had not been found and that worried Jason. For both Zander's and Elizabeth's sake. "Zander stays here with me," he stated firmly.
"Okay. Then just watch him. He's borderline catatonic right now, which means he could slip out of it at anytime. Just be prepared for any reaction. He might remember everything, or nothing. He might even remember the stuff he'd forgotten."
Jason sighed. "Man...he is really messed up. I mean...what Alcazar did was bad enough. But I think Zander's brother sexually abused him and he blocked it out. And until now he blocked out the shit Sorel did to him. I mean...what the fuck? Does the kid have *Fuck me!* tattooed on his forehead?"
Sorato locked eyes with Jason. "You fucked him, so you tell me."
"It wasn't like that."
"If you say so." Sorato collected his medical bag. "Call me if you need me." With that he was gone.
Jason moved to the chair by Zander's bed. Zander was curled up on his side, facing him, and he looked so damn young that it shook Jason a bit. Jason closed his eyes and remembered what Dr. Sorato had said. He had fucked Zander but he hadn't meant to use the kid. Yet that's what ultimately had happened. He had used Zander and so had everyone else. And now Zander was about used up. "Fuck!" Jason whispered, then he closed his eyes. He let sleep claim him.
* * * * *
Zander woke up alone. He looked around the room in a panic. This wasn't Alcazar's manor. Yet the place seemed familiar somehow. Zander was shaking as he slid out of bed. He didn't know what to expect and he felt itchy and he knew it was the aftereffects of the drugs that Alcazar had been giving him. Drugs to make him sleep. Drugs to turn pleasure into pain. What Zander wanted now was a drug to make him forget.
He moved to the dresser and found clothes that looked like they would fit him. He slipped out of the sweat pants and pulled on jeans. Found a black shirt and pulled it on over the tank top he was wearing. In another drawer Zander found socks and a wad of hundred dollar bills. He pulled on the socks then tucked the money into his jeans pocket. He found a gun as well and he shoved that into the back of his jeans. A light jacket was tossed over a nearby chair and Zander shrugged that on as well. It would hide the gun. Then he looked for shoes and he found black sneakers. Close enough. He put them on and was about to walk out when he heard footsteps approaching. Zander hid behind the door. When the person entered he pounced, gun drawn.
"Zander!" Jason was stunned.
"Where am I?" Zander demanded, the gun trained at Jason's chest.
Jason raised his arms. "You're in a safe place. Okay? Put the gun down and we'll talk."
Zander shook his head. "No talking. I'm out of here. As soon as you tell me where *here* is." Zander curled his finger around the trigger to show that he was serious.
"You're on an island."
"Where is Alcazar?"
Jason blinked. "You remember him?"
It was Zander's turn to be stunned. "Of course I remember him. What the fuck is going on?" How could he forget what the man had done to him? Then Zander remembered something else. "Where is Elizabeth?"
"Alcazar has her."
"Fuck...FUCK!" Zander felt panic surge through him, but he didn't lose focus. He kept the gun trained on Jason. "What the hell happened, man? What am I doing here?"
Jason locked eyes with Zander, trying to reach him. "Elizabeth managed to help me rescue you. She provided a distraction so we could escape."
Zander shook his head. "You sonofabitch! You should have left me there and rescued her."
"She didn't want that."
"He'll hurt her."
Jason risked a step closer. "No he won't. He'll use her to get you back. You can't go back, Zander."
Zander waved the gun at Jason, warning him to stop. "I have to go back."
"Zander...I know about what Sorel did to you. And your brother."
"What are you talking about?"
Jason took another step. "I know that Sorel loaned you out for sex. And I know that Peter sexually abused you as well."
Zander felt himself shaking. "SHUT UP!" he shouted. "Shut up! You don't know what the hell you're talking about!" He didn't want to hear the lies. He didn't want to remember. So he lashed out, striking Jason on the temple with the gun. He watched the other man crumple to the floor then he stepped over him and ran out of the room. He would find his way back to Alcazar. Elizabeth needed him.
© Shelly 2004